Missed Notes: A Brother's Best Friend Romance (Rixon High) Page 3

  After a restless night’s sleep, I traipsed down to the kitchen. At least Dad had stayed away last night. I wouldn’t have to face—

  “Good morning,” his gruff voice stopped me dead in my tracks.

  “I thought you were out of town?”

  “Nice to see you too.” The muscle in his jaw pulsed.

  I made a beeline for the coffee machine, leaving him to his emails or case notes or whatever the fuck he was doing while he drank his coffee.

  “How’s that application for Drexel coming, Son?”

  “I told you, it’s not what I want to do.” I met his severe gaze with my own.

  “And I thought I told you that I won’t fund an arts degree so you can spend four years wasting your time on that pipe dream of yours.”

  “Nice, Dad, real nice.” Turning my back on him, I made a fist on the counter, fighting the urge to give him a piece of my mind.

  It wouldn’t help.

  It never did.

  Curtis Kandon was a formidable man, used to getting his own way in and out of the courtroom.

  “Cole, look at me, Son.” An order not a request. Reluctantly, I glanced back at him, waiting for whatever bullshit was about to spew from his mouth. “I thought we’d straightened all of this out. I will fund your college tuition so long as you take a pre-law course. If you want to broaden your horizons away from Drexel, we can discuss that. Temple has a great program. But the clock is ticking, Cole. You need to get a move on.”

  “And if I don’t want to take the pre-law course?”

  His expression darkened as he flattened his hands on the counter. “That is not an option, Son. Your mother and I—”

  “Cut the bullshit, Dad. You, you decided this for me. Not her. She doesn’t even—”

  “Enough, Cole.” He banged his fist down, making his coffee cup rattle. “I won’t keep doing this with you. It was always the plan for you to follow in your old man’s footsteps. Most kids would be counting their lucky stars that their parents were offering to pay—”

  “I get it, okay. I get it.” Frustration bled from every word. But there was no reasoning with him when he was like this.

  “Enjoy your senior year at Rixon High, Cole. Help the team win state, get your little hobby out of your system, then head to college and focus on your future.”

  A future that, if he had his way, didn’t include music or football.

  “I’ve got to go,” I said, unwilling to stick around and listen to any more of his bullshit.

  But in typical Curtis Kandon style, he had to have the final word.

  “You can’t outrun your destiny forever, Son. It’s time to stop fooling around and step up and do what needs to be done.”

  I sucked on the inside of my cheek as I blew down the hall, desperate to escape from him. From his dismissive, cruel words. Before I said something I might regret.

  Something I couldn’t ever take back.

  CHAPTER THREE

  Sofia

  Aaron breezed into my room and dropped down on the end of my bed. “You look like crap.”

  “Good morning to you too.”

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Exhausted, but I’ll be fine.” The lie sounded convincing enough.

  “You’ll be back to being a pain in my ass in no time.” He grinned. “You think you’ll be up to going to school tomorrow?”

  “Hopefully.”

  Emotion clogged in my throat.

  I hated lying to him, but I wasn’t ready to tell him. Not when everything was going so right for him.

  This was my burden to carry, not Aaron’s.

  Not yet.

  Not until things got… desperate.

  Leukemia.

  The word clanged through me again. It still didn’t feel real, and yet, I’d known. Deep down, some part of me had known what Dr. Peters was going to say before he’d even said the words.

  “I’d better go. But I’ll tell everyone you say hi.”

  “Thanks.” Strangled laughter bubbled out of me.

  Aaron walked to the door, but paused at the last second, glancing back. “I love you, Sofe.”

  “Love you too, jerk face. Now get out of here. I need more beauty sleep.”

  He gave me a salute and slipped into the hall, leaving me alone.

  I inhaled a shuddering breath, fighting back the tears threatening to fall. But I wouldn’t cry, I couldn’t. Because if I started, I might never stop. And the fight hadn’t really begun yet.

  Until we knew exactly what we were dealing with, Dr. Peters couldn’t give me a prognosis beyond that my blood markers pointed to leukemia.

  When we’d left the hospital yesterday, I’d been numb. The ride home had been some of the hardest minutes of my life, listening to Mom sob while Dad tried to comfort her. But instead of breaking, I’d pulled away. Shored up my defenses. And when they’d asked if I wanted them to tell Aaron, I’d told them I didn’t want to tell him at all.

  “Sweetheart?” A knock at the door followed, and Mom poked her head inside. “How are you feeling?”

  “I’m okay.”

  “Sofia.” She came inside. “You don’t have to do that. You don’t have to put on a brave face around me.”

  “I… I don’t know what to feel.”

  Perching on the edge of the bed, she took my hand in hers. “Aaron stopped by?” I nodded. “You know, I don’t like it, sweetheart. Keeping this from him. He has a right to know.” She gave me a disapproving look.

  “I’m not ready, Mom. We don’t know… what it means yet.” I choked over the ball of emotion lodged in my throat. “Once we have more information, I’ll tell him.”

  “Okay.” She squeezed my hand. “It’s a lot to digest, I understand that. I still can’t—” Clapping a hand over her mouth she caught the sob there.

  “Mom, please…” I couldn’t do it again. See her break. See the tears streak down her cheeks.

  “It’s so unfair, sweetheart. You don’t deserve this. You don’t…”

  “No one deserves this, Mom.” I gave her the best smile I could muster, but it felt hollow. Empty and weak.

  She dried her tears and took a deep breath. “Well, whatever the results show, I want you to know we’ll fight this thing head on, baby. You’re young and healthy, and you can beat this. I know you can.”

  “Hey.” Dad appeared in the door wearing a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “How are my two favorite girls?”

  “Dad,” I choked on the word.

  “What? A man can’t check in on his girls now?” He came over and sat on the other side of my bed. “How are you feeling?”

  “A little sore but okay. Don’t you have to get to work?”

  “I figured I’d take the day off and hang with my girl.”

  “No, Dad. You don’t need—”

  But he was already swinging his legs onto the end and lying back against the headboard. “Hmm, this is nice. Comfy.”

  “Oh my God, Mom, tell him.” I looked to her for support, but she was wiping more tears from her eyes.

  “I wish I could stay too.”

  “No. No way. I need you both to stop.”

  “Sofia—”

  “No, Mom, I can’t do this. I can’t have you both acting like I’m—” The words got stuck in my throat as pain lanced through me.

  “Shh, sweetheart.” Dad wrapped me in his arms. “I got you, Sofia. I got you.”

  Mom snuggled me from behind, the two of them sandwiching me, hugging the life out of me while I tried my hardest not to break.

  “We love you, sweetheart, and we’re going to get through this.”

  “I love you too, Mom, Dad,” I murmured, my bottom lip wobbling. Refusing to let them see me cry, I buried my face in Dad’s chest, letting the two of them cocoon me. Wrap me up in their love and comfort.

  It was going to be a few days until Dr. Peters got the results of my bone marrow tests.

  Until I knew what lay ahead.

  God, just the thought of it had my stomach churning like a stormy sea.

  “Shh,” Dad soothed, tightening his arm around me and Mom. “It’ll all be okay, baby. We’re here. We’re right here.” His voice cracked and I sobbed harder.

  Because hearing my dad—the one man who would do anything to protect me—break, broke something inside of me too.

  “We love you, Sofia. We love you so freaking much, sweetheart. You can fight this.” He kissed my head.

  And I held on tight, letting myself have this moment of weakness, knowing it wouldn’t be the last time I did.

  “Sofia?” Aaron’s voice rang out through the house.

  “In here,” I called from my position on the living room sectional.

  I’d been here all day, lying under a blanket, snacking on Oreo minis and Cheetos while I binge-watched Netflix.

  Dad stayed with me the first couple of hours, trying to keep the mood light and the jokes flowing. But after a while, he began to get on my nerves, so I’d banished him to his home office.

  My brother appeared. “What are we watching?”

  “Just some docuseries about— oh, it’s you.” My eyes narrowed on Cole who stood awkwardly in the door.

  “Hey, how are you feeling?”

  “I’m fine,” I snapped.

  “Come on, Sofe. Cut Kandon some slack.” Aaron chuckled, diving over the back of the couch and patting the space next to him. “Get over here, bro.”

  “Maybe I should just go,” he said.

  “Nah, Kandon. Sofia will behave. Besides, I can’t have my two favorite people arguing all year. It’s not good for my feng shui.”

  “Your feng shui? Wow,” I balked. “You are such an asshole.”

  “And you’re such a cranky bitch lately, but you don’t see
me complaining.” He grinned at me, and I flipped him off.

  “Can’t you two go and hang out in the man cave or something?”

  “And leave you here all alone? Not gonna happen, Sis.”

  “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes and laid back down, refusing to look at either of them. But I felt Cole’s heated stare, feeling everything he wanted to say and wouldn’t, not in front of my brother.

  “Can you come back to school tomorrow?” Aaron asked, scrolling on his phone.

  “Yeah, I’ll be back.”

  “Good. Place isn’t the same without you.” He smiled at whatever had his interest.

  “Let me guess, Poppy?” I arched a brow and he smirked at me.

  “Correct. We have an away game Friday in Pittsburgh. You’re going to come, right?”

  “Is everyone staying over?”

  “That’s the plan.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “What? Why? You have to come. I thought Dr. Peters said—”

  “I’ll see how I feel.”

  “Yeah, of course.” He gave me a strange look.

  Did he feel it?

  The lie hanging between us.

  The big, life-changing secret.

  Guilt coiled around my heart, but I ignored it. Telling Aaron wasn’t an option, not yet. Besides, if I told Aaron, he would tell Poppy and most likely Cole. And before long, everybody would know, and I’d no longer be Sofia Bennet.

  I would be Sofia Bennet, the girl with leukemia.

  I didn’t want, or need, that kind of attention.

  This was my business and I wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible.

  “I can’t believe there are only four games left until the playoffs.” Aaron kicked his feet up on the coffee table.

  “Don’t let Mom see you do that,” I said.

  “What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.” He leaned over, grabbing a handful of Cheetos.

  “Pig,” I muttered. “Can’t you go and annoy someone else?”

  “Yeah, come on, Aaron. Maybe we should leave her to it,” Cole said.

  “Is this how it’s going to be now? The two of you, unable to be in the same room together?” Aaron pouted in that overdramatic way of his. “Because that’s not going to work for me. It’s senior year, guys. Senior fucking year.”

  His words struck something inside me, and I sat up, inhaling a sharp breath.

  “Shit, Sofe, you good?”

  “Y-yeah.” I gave him the best smile I could muster. “Just feel a little nauseous. I’ll be back.”

  “You need me to come—”

  “I can manage to go to the bathroom, Aaron.”

  He held up his hands, concern pinching his brows. “Sorry, I didn’t mean—”

  “It’s fine.” Another smile. Another lie. “I’ll be back.”

  I left them in the living room, slipping into the hall and going to the small downstairs bathroom at the back of the house. Aaron’s words had cut deep, slicing through me like a serrated blade.

  Senior year.

  Senior fucking year.

  God, how was I going to do this? Paste on a smile and lie to him and everyone else around me?

  But it was for the best, wasn’t it?

  Better than sharing the burden and ruining their final months at high school.

  Eventually, I’d tell them—I’d have to. But if I could protect them for at least a little bit, that was better than nothing.

  Sure, Mom and Dad thought it was a bad idea, but they had to know that Aaron’s life, our friends’ lives, would be upended too once they discovered the truth.

  Ashleigh and Ezra had already been through enough. Aaron and Poppy too. Then there were our friends already away at college. Poppy’s sister Lily and her boyfriend Kaiden.

  My stomach dipped as I entered the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I didn’t really need to puke. I just needed a minute to catch my breath, to steady myself to face Aaron once more. I had to be more careful because if he looked too closely…

  I couldn’t do that to him.

  Not yet.

  Splashing some water on my face, I stared at myself in the mirror. It was strange. One minute you had your whole life ahead of you. Prom. Graduation. College. First love. First heartbreak. First apartment. First job. And the next, the future was no longer guaranteed. Murky with darkness. The unknown. So many things you dreamed of doing but might never get to do.

  I was eighteen. Life was supposed to be for living. For experiencing things and learning from your mistakes. Yet here I was, on the cusp of fighting for my life.

  It wasn’t fair.

  Emotion welled inside me again. A tumultuous storm of anger and disbelief, of frustration and terror.

  I didn’t want to die.

  I wanted to live.

  To follow my dreams, to chase them down with both hands.

  “Sofia?”

  I flinched, the loud bang on the bathroom door startling me.

  “You okay in there, sweetheart?” Dad asked. “Aaron said you got sick.”

  “False alarm, Dad. I’m fine. I’ll be out in a second.” My lips wobbled again, tears rolling down my cheeks.

  “Okay, well if you need any—”

  “I’m fine,” I snapped, instantly regretting it. But I didn’t know how to do this.

  There wasn’t a rulebook I could follow.

  I dried my eyes, waiting another minute or so before going out to face them. I didn’t expect to come face to face with Cole.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “N-nothing, I’m fine.” I went to brush past him, but he gently touched my arm.

  “Sofia, please… Talk to me.”

  “So you can run off and tell Aaron? No thanks.”

  “That’s not fair and you know it.”

  “Cole, I—”

  He reached for me, cupping my face and brushing his thumb under my eye, catching the tear there. “You’re crying.”

  “I’m not.”

  His brow lifted, doubt shining in his gaze.

  “I’m fine.”

  “I know you’re pissed with me.”

  Understatement of the century. I bit my tongue, unwilling to do this with him again.

  “But I’m here, Sofia. I can help.”

  “No, Cole.” I gave him a sad smile as I pulled away from him, hating that things weren’t different. “You can’t.”

  Because the stark truth of the matter was…

  No one could.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Cole

  I couldn’t shake the feeling Sofia was hiding something. She’d been too cagey the other day, when Aaron had insisted I hang out with him at their house.

  At school, she put on a smile, laughing and joking with everyone as if she hadn’t spent the beginning of the week getting tests at the hospital.

  But Aaron and the others seemed to buy her story. I’d barely spoken two words to her since she was mostly avoiding me. If our paths crossed, she walked the other way. If our eyes met across the cafeteria, she looked away.

  It was starting to piss me off.

  I’d only done what I had to help her.

  It had royally backfired on me though and I didn’t like it. Sofia had always been a part of my life. A good friend.

  Now, it was like we were strangers.

  There would be no escaping each other tonight though. We had an away game in Pittsburgh and since it was an eight-hour round trip, we were staying over. I’d heard Sofia telling Poppy and Ashleigh she was going to come, but only because Mr. and Mrs. Bennet were making the trip too.

  Something didn’t add up.

  At least, that was what my gut was telling me. But it wasn’t like I could call her out on it.

  “Kandon, get your head on straight, son,” Coach warned as we watched game play tapes of the Tigers in the media room.

  “See their defensive tackle,” he said. “Goes in hard every time. You’ll need to use your wide receiver, Cole. Use Ezra. Their defense is big, but he’s fast. Get the ball to him and he’ll do the rest of the work.”

  I nodded, trying to act interested.

  “Okay.” Coach Macintosh paused the tapes and hit the lights, plunging the room into brightness. “Bus leaves at two.”

  As I got up to leave, Coach Ford cornered me by the door. “Have you given any more thought to those college applications? Syracuse and Penn State won’t wait forever.”