Ruined Hopes: An Enemies-to-Lovers Romance (Rixon High) Page 3

  “Usual, Ezra?” Manny called across the counter and I nodded. “Better make it two.”

  “Coming right up.”

  “You come here a lot?” Aaron gawked at me.

  We were brothers by definition, sure. But I didn’t spend a lot of time with him, or his sister, or their friends. They liked partying and football and high school drama, and I… didn’t.

  I kept to myself. It was easier that way.

  When I’d first arrived at the Bennets’, they had all tried to encourage me to hang out with Aaron, Sofia, and their friends. But everything was different in Rixon. And the Bennets… they had money. They had a big house and nice things, and I had the clothes on my back, a boatload of bad memories, and a closet full of skeletons.

  It wasn’t easy trying to fit in, knowing I never really would, and as time went on, it just became easier to stop trying.

  “Now and again.”

  “You know, E, we’ve been brothers a long time now.” Aaron drummed his fingers against the Formica table. “Yet, sometimes, it’s like I don’t even know you. But since we’re going to be seniors together—”

  My spine snapped straight. So he knew. Aaron knew what his father had demanded of me.

  I wasn’t surprised, not really. Asher had probably railroaded Aaron into taking me under his wing once the start of the semester rolled around. But I was still hoping to get out of it. High school was over. Done. It wasn’t like I had plans to go to college.

  Asher and Mya had wanted it for me, but they hadn’t pushed. Not too hard. Not until it was apparent I wasn’t going to graduate.

  I hadn’t witnessed Asher lose his shit much over the years. But when Mya came home at the beginning of senior year and handed him my transcripts… his anger had been a living, breathing thing.

  They’d expected me to turn it around, and I hadn’t.

  I hadn’t even tried.

  “It would be cool to hang out occasionally.” Aaron yanked me back to the present. “Dad’s hoping you’ll join the team. Coach Ford said—”

  “I’m not joining the team,” I said, flatly.

  “But I’ve seen your throwing arm and you’re fast, E. Really fucking fast. You’d be an asset to the Raiders, and with Kaiden, Gav, and Bryan all moving on, we could use fresh blood.”

  I couldn’t think of anything worse than training with the Rixon Raiders under Coach Ford’s leadership. Ashleigh was his niece for fuck’s sake. It was a disaster waiting to happen.

  One I wanted no part of.

  “Here you go,” one of the regular servers, a sweet girl called Penny, said as she delivered our drinks. She flashed me a warm smile. “Your food will be out in a minute.”

  “Thanks, Pen,” I drawled.

  “Any time, E.” Her cheeks flushed as she hurried away.

  “Friend of yours?” Aaron craned his neck to get a better look at her retreating form. “She’s cute.”

  “Sure, if you like that kind of thing.”

  He snorted. “And you’re telling me, you don’t?”

  “Pen is… cool.”

  “Cool, yeah. The way she was looking at you, bro, so cool.” He smirked, glancing back over to where Penny was wiping down the counter. She glanced over and flashed us a bright smile.

  “I don’t recognize her from school.”

  “She’s at college, asshole.”

  “Nice. Where does she go?”

  “Rixon Community College.”

  “You should ask her out.”

  “What?” I ran a hand over my hair and down the back of my neck, gawking at him.

  Aaron shrugged. “She’s hot and older and has a job. What’s not to like?”

  “Does Asher know you’re such a dog?” I tsked. “Besides, I thought you had your sights set on Poppy.”

  “Ew gross, Poppy is…” He hesitated, his eyes flickering with something. “Poppy’s like a sister to me. It would be totally weird.”

  “Two house specials.” Penny reappeared with our burgers.

  “Wow, this looks great, thanks.” Aaron shot her a wide grin.

  “Can I get you anything else, Ezra?”

  “I’m all good, thanks.” I gave her a small nod. She lingered for a second, her eyelashes fluttering.

  “You know where I am if you need me.” She hurried away.

  “She wants a piece of you, man.” Aaron’s eyes twinkled as he tore into his burger.

  “Yeah, well, I’m not interested.

  There was only one girl who had ever caught my eye in Rixon…

  And I didn’t fucking deserve her.

  We stayed at The Junction until the sun disappeared into the horizon. Aaron didn’t tease me about Penny anymore, and she was too busy dealing with other tables to hover at ours.

  “I don’t know whether to be pissed you kept this place to yourself,” Aaron said as we settled the check, splitting it. “Or whether to high-five you. That burger was fucking awesome.”

  “Yeah, Manny’s burgers are the best.”

  “Damn straight,” the man in question hollered across the diner, winking at me.

  We’d almost made our way to the door when Penny intervened. “You’re leaving?”

  “I’ll be outside,” Aaron said, flashing me a knowing grin.

  “So, I was wondering…”

  “Listen, Pen, I’m not—”

  “Oh God, this is embarrassing.” She pushed her dark bangs out of her eyes. “I thought… okay, let’s just pretend this didn’t happen.”

  “Sorry,” I said, feeling like a giant asshole.

  “Yeah, no, it’s fine. I’m fine. Totally fine.” She smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes. “Well, I should go.”

  “See you around.”

  “Bye.” Penny took off toward the counter, not sparing me a backward glance.

  Fuck, that was awkward. But I liked it here too much to get tangled up with the staff.

  It was one of the few places I could come and avoid people: the kids from school; Asher and Mya, their friends; my brother, sister, and their friends.

  “Got yourself a hot date?” Aaron teased as I joined him on the sidewalk.

  Rolling my eyes, I jammed my hands in my hoodie pocket and took off down the street.

  “Come on, E, it was a joke. I’m joking.” He nudged my shoulder with his, falling into step beside me.

  “I know,” I murmured, putting some space between us. Shaking off the discomfort I felt at his close proximity.

  Silence lingered as we kept walking back toward the house. The place I’d called home for the last seven years.

  Even if after all this time, it still didn’t feel like it.

  It was my problem though, not theirs. I knew that. Asher, Mya, Aaron, and Sofia had done everything to welcome me into their family, to make me one of them.

  But something inside of me was broken. Jagged and cracked.

  And I didn’t know how to fix it.

  Chapter Four

  Ashleigh

  “Ready, sweetheart?” Dad asked me for the third time.

  He was nervous; they all were.

  Mom, Dad, and Avery.

  Because after two weeks and three days of going stir crazy in the hospital, I was finally being discharged.

  “As I’ll ever be.” I gave a small sigh, my body still weary from its recovering injuries.

  Mom helped me sit up, helped drag my legs over the edge of the bed, and handed me my crutches.

  I’d worked all week with the physical therapist, practicing supporting my body weight with the walking aids. It was tiring work, muscles straining and working overtime to compensate for the lack of movement in my right foot.

  “Okay?” Dad asked, gently holding my elbow while I stood. He let me get my balance then slowly backed away. “You seem much sturdier on these now.”

  “I slipped once, Dad.”

  “Twice.” He grinned. “Just be careful, okay? You’ve given us enough near heart attacks these last few weeks.

&nbs
p; Six weeks and two days to be exact.

  It was strange. It felt longer, and yet, it felt like no time at all. I guess that was just one of the many strange side effects of my amnesia. Like time had been folded in on itself.

  I’d spent all week with Lily and Poppy and Sofia, letting them slowly feed me pieces of the last ten months. They were patient but I saw the pity in their eyes every time I stared vacantly at them.

  And I hated it.

  But I had two choices. I could choose to succumb to the gnawing devastation and grief I felt every time I let myself go there, or I could face this thing head on.

  As Mom and Dad walked me out of the hospital, giving me time to go at my own pace, I was somewhere in the middle. I didn’t want to let my new reality overshadow my future. But I also wasn’t ready to embrace the possibility that my memories—the last ten months of my life—were lost.

  “Ashleigh?” Mom touched my arm and I blinked up at her. “The car…” She motioned to where Dad’s SUV pulled up in front of us.

  At least some things were the same.

  A small smile played on my lips as I climbed into the back seat.

  “It’ll be good to get you home,” Mom said, glancing back at me as she buckled up. “The doctor said being in familiar surroundings might help.”

  “Hailee,” Dad said, quietly.

  “It’s okay, Dad. You guys don’t need to do that.” Whisper and confer as if they were plotting behind my back. I understood my diagnosis, the likelihood of my lost memories never fully returning.

  I got it.

  I was the one living it, after all.

  “Sorry, sweetheart. We just don’t want you to—”

  “Mom,” I snapped. “I’m fine.”

  Even if my mind insisted it was the beginning of senior year instead of the middle of summer.

  She gave me a tentative smile, and I could see the concern swirling in her eyes. She was worried. They both were. But she didn’t push, and we rode the short distance back to our house in comfortable silence.

  “Avery’s still here,” I said, noticing his car in the driveway.

  He was supposed to be returning to Notre Dame for football camp.

  “He wanted to see you before he left.”

  I smiled at that. The truth was, I wanted to see him too. He was my big brother, my protector, the one guy who didn’t try and sugarcoat things for me.

  As if I’d summoned him, Avery appeared at the door. He wasted no time, bounding over to me and yanking the door open. “Welcome home, Leigh Leigh.” He grinned, offering me his hand. I let him pull me from the car.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Good.” I nodded. “Better now that I’m out of that place.”

  “Come on.” He slung his arm around my shoulder. “Let’s go find you something to eat.”

  “Because eating solves everything.”

  “It does when it’s cupcakes from Sprinkles.”

  “Tell me you got the red velvet ones, oh and the chocolate fudge ones.”

  “You know it.” Avery smiled down at me as we walked into the house.

  Everything was so familiar. It was like coming home after a day at school. Except, I couldn’t help but pick out everything that was different. Like the new family portrait on the sideboard or the lingering scent of vanilla.

  “That’s new,” I said, sniffing the air.

  Mom was typically a jasmine and freesia kind of woman.

  Avery gave me space, letting me acquaint myself with everything. I ran my fingers over the photographs lining the wall. Candids of our life. Me and Avery as children. Mom and Dad as doting parents. Avery and Miley the night of their prom….

  Me the night of senior prom.

  I sucked in a sharp breath, staring at the photograph through the eyes of a stranger.

  “Leigh—” Avery came up beside me, his hand resting on my shoulder. “Does it… spark anything?”

  “Nothing.” Not a damn thing. My voice quivered as I stared at the girl smiling back at me.

  Me. Dressed in a black fit-and-flare dress, my hair curled and pinned up in some intricate coronet.

  It was me; I knew that.

  Yet it didn’t feel like me.

  I sucked in another sharp breath, trying to keep my tears at bay.

  “It’s going to be strange,” Avery said, gently trying to guide me away from the photographs. “But you’ve got this, Leigh Leigh.”

  Funny, because I didn’t feel like I had it. In fact, I felt like I was wading through dark muddy waters.

  “Is everything okay?” Dad called from the front door as he and Mom came inside.

  “Everything’s fine,” Avery replied for me, keeping his arm tight around my shoulder as we headed for the kitchen.

  Tears welled in my eyes when I spotted the balloon and tower of cupcakes and the small ‘welcome home’ banner.

  “It was Mom’s idea.” Avery squeezed my shoulder before releasing me. Giving me a second, I figured.

  “People aren’t about to jump out from behind the furniture, are they?” My brow arched and he chuckled.

  “No, there’s no one hiding around the corner. We just wanted to do… something.”

  “It’s sweet,” I said, losing the fight against the emotion clogging my throat.

  “We’re just so happy to have you home,” Mom said, wrapping her arm around me and kissing my cheek.

  “Thanks, Mom. Dad.” I caught his eye over her shoulder.

  “It’s going to be okay, Ashleigh.” He smiled.

  Those words.

  Words that I wanted so badly to believe.

  But I couldn’t.

  Not yet.

  “Ashleigh,” Mom called, and I pulled out my earbuds.

  “Yeah?”

  “The girls are here.”

  Laughter filtered down the hall outside my bedroom and the knot in my stomach tightened. Lily had texted earlier asking if her and Peyton could come visit. Of course, I’d said yes. But it felt different now.

  In the hospital, there had been a buffer. I could hide behind my injuries and the constant check-ups by the nurse and doctor. If I didn’t want to talk, I could feign being exhausted.

  I couldn’t hide now.

  People would expect me to get back to some kind of normal.

  “Hey.” Lily’s face appeared around the door. “Aunt Hailee sent us up.”

  “Come in.” I smiled, hoping they couldn’t see the strain there.

  “We brought supplies.” Peyton smiled, holding up a grocery bag.

  “You didn’t have to.”

  “We wanted to.” She dropped down in my desk chair. “How are you feeling?”

  “Okay.”

  “It must be nice to be home,” Lily said.

  “It’s… nice, yeah.” I ran my hands over my bedcover.

  “Sorry, I didn’t—”

  “No, it’s fine. I just… I saw the photos from prom in the hall and it was like looking at someone else.”

  “It didn’t help?” Peyton asked.

  Worrying my bottom lip, I shook my head.

  Did they expect it would be that simple? That I’d look at a few photos and everything would come rushing back?

  The doctor said it would take time—if it happened at all.

  “It’s going to take time,” Lily said with a warm smile. She sat on the edge of my bed, her soulful blue eyes seeing too much.

  “How’s work?” I asked Peyton, changing the subject.

  “It’s work.” She shrugged. “I like it and the people are nice but…” She trailed off, not meeting my eyes.

  “But what?” I frowned.

  Peyton looked to Lily and she nodded. “She’d want to know.”

  “Know what? Will somebody just tell me what’s going on?”

  “I’ve been thinking about applying to college.”

  “That’s great, isn’t it?” I glanced between them.

  “It is, but I just thought…”

  “
She was worried it was a sore subject.”

  “Oh.” Because I wouldn’t be going off to college this year. I’d be stuck at high school, repeating the year. Without my best friends.

  “I haven’t decided anything yet.”

  “What does Uncle Xander think about it?” I asked.

  It was still so weird to imagine them together. They’d avoided coming to the hospital together and I wondered if it was another attempt at easing me into things. But everyone seemed okay with it. Even Uncle Jason and Aunt Felicity who had practically raised Peyton for the last year of her life.

  “He’s supportive, although I don’t think he likes the idea of me around a bunch of horndog college guys. His words, not mine.” A faint smile played on her lips.

  “What about you and Kaiden?” I asked Lily. “Are you excited about moving to college?”

  “I am so excited.” Her expression didn’t exactly look excited. “But I’ll miss you both. I’ll miss Rixon.”

  “Well, I’ll be right here, waiting for you to visit.”

  It was supposed to be a joke, but it came out in a rush of strained breath.

  “Leigh…”

  Pity and sympathy. That was the only emotion etched into my best friends’ expressions as they watched me.

  So much pity…

  As if they knew the cost of my injury. But even if they knew, they couldn’t understand.

  No one could.

  I’d survived the accident. I could remember their faces, our history, the bonds connecting us. I could remember a whole childhood. Almost eighteen years of memories and experiences, highs and lows.

  But I couldn’t remember senior year. And that hole, that gaping hollow hole, was like a black void sucking everything else dry.

  You’re lucky, Ashleigh. It could have been worse.

  Much worse.

  I knew that; I did. But it didn’t change anything.

  “Has anyone heard from Ezra?” The words were out before I could stop them. “He didn’t visit me.”

  “He’s… not in a good place, Leigh.” Lily pressed her lips together. “I heard Sofia and Poppy talking about it. She thinks he blames himself.”

  “Because of the accident?” My brows knitted, an icky sensation clanging through me.

  “Because he walked away with a couple of scratches, I guess… and you didn’t.”